In my adult life, I never had a TV
Could probably take the TV licensing people to court for the amount of threatening letters they sent.
I don't have a TV - By choice!
I always said no to BGT
My instincts were saying no!
I had spent 27 years building up my career as The Dangerous Harpist
I had broken the mould, built up skill and devoted myself to songwriting, comedy, circus, theatre and performance with harp.
I remember seeing the talent scouts in my show at Edi fest
They stood out from the punters
Then the emails and calls
For four years they asked me to come on to the show
and for four years I said no.
Then, that year
I began to wonder
Maybe,
I was bored with Belfast.
The art scene was changing.
I was tired of the same grind.
They called,
I said no!
Have a look in Derry?
They said "We are calling from Derry"
I said, "Don't tell me Britain run out of talent"
they laughed weakly.
We agreed to meet the next day..........
They came to my studio and filmed my audition.
The next day they called and offered all expenses to London to play
the palladium
Who doesn't want to play the palladium?
I used to work in Pizza Express across the road and dream of playing there!
It was the golden carrot. It was so easy to be tempted by the Palladium.
I really enjoyed that bit.
The standing ovation
4 yesses
my own material
the buzz
I was flying to London to sign contracts
it was exciting.
and keep time free
They made you feel special.
And that was the manipulation
because it was only when that show aired
and I was shamed in the Sun
that I realised
They placed me in the shame box.
I tried to retreat
I was flip flopping
panic attacks
no guidance
I tried to retreat
and then went forward
with my head in the lion's mouth
and I knew it.
I could not proceed with my own material
They knew their audience
bla bla bla
as a pro I did not know HOW to get out....
Once that machine spat me out, I needed counselling
The first blot in my copybook of a 27-year career.
People still call me crazy!
When challenged they say," it is a term of endearment"
but its not
It is the power of language, suggestion, TV
and the machine
I sat alone reading the hate on Twitter
It took years to recover
A few months ago I wrote to the BGT lawyer to ask could they take this article down
https://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/britains-talent-fans-slam-saucy-16229165?utm_source=linkCopy&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=sharebar
I got no response
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